Today’s Quotes: Expert-Tease

A random collection of quotes by experts in their fields:

“What use could this company make of an electrical toy?”
— William Orton, president of Western Union, in 1876, after being offered the chance to purchase the patent for Alexander Graham Bell’s telephone.

“Do not bother to sell your gas shares. The electric light has no future.”
—Dr. John Henry Pepper, Victorian-era celebrity scientist, sometime in the 1870s.

“Stocks have reached a permanently high plateau.”
— Dr. Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics at Yale University, shortly before the crash of 1929.

“No matter what happens, the U.S. Navy is not going to be caught napping.”
— Secretary of the Navy Frank Knox on Dec. 4, 1941, three days before the surprise attack on Pearl Harbor.

“Radio has no future. Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible. X-rays are a hoax.”
— Lord Kelvin (William Thomson), a scientist and member of the British Royal Academy of Science, in 1899.

“Everything that can be invented has been invented.”
—Charles H Duell, Commissioner of US Office of Patents, 1899.

“With over 50 foreign cars already on sale here, the Japanese auto industry isn’t likely to carve out a big slice of the U.S. market.”
— Business Week, Aug. 2, 1968.

“Fred Astaire can’t act, can’t sing, balding … Can dance a little.”
— From an MGM talent scout’s memo, 1928.

“What can you do with a guy with ears like that?”
— Jack Warner, head of Warner Bros. studios, rejecting Clark Gable in 1930.

“Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?”
— Harry M. Warner of Warner Bros. studios in 1927.

“You ain’t goin’ nowhere, son. You ought to go back to drivin’ a truck.”
— Jim Denny of the Grand Ole Opry in Nashville, firing Elvis Presley after his first performance at the Opry.

“Not to mince words, Mr. Epstein, but we don’t like your boys’ sound. Groups are out; four-piece groups with guitars particularly are finished.”
— Dick Rowe, executive talent scout for the London office of Decca Records in 1962, turning down a record contract with The Beatles. (Perhaps to make amends, Rowe later signed The Rolling Stones.)

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Signs o’ the Times: Easter Parade

1. Yup, Easter used to be a pagan festival celebrating the fecundity of spring or something like that.

2. The traditional New Testament Jesus would not be welcomed into the Republican Party nor most Christian churches today.  Give away your possessions to the poor? Forgive your enemies? Judge not? Love one another? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you? It’s all still too radical and difficult for most modern Christians to follow and you can imagine the boos and catcalls if Jesus should dare run for president.

3. This is about the size of it, and why modern Judeo-Christians are so at odds with Jesus’ message of love and peace. The Gospel is supposed to be the ‘Good News’ of a new covenant with God, obviating and replacing the Old Testament, but most Christians ignore that.

4. One of the wackier argunents presented by the Christopublicans as to why we have found fossils millions of years old when they claim the universe was created no more than ten-thousand years ago: ‘God planted those fossils as a test of faith.’

5. This is more like the ‘Capitalist Savior’ Jesus the Christian Right believes in.

6. While children starve, the priests dress in finery and live in luxury. Whose side would Jesus be on? As Catholic Archbishop Helder Camara once said, “When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why they are poor, they call me a communist.”

7. As Mark Twain wrote, “Go to to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”


H/T to Michael Dare, Dareland.com.

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Today’s Quote: Penn Jillette on the Bible

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If Jesus Came to Sanford, Florida

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Cartoons: Easter Sunday Religious Rundown

1. This is the America Christopublicans seem to be shooting for:

2. In my experience, so-called ‘secular humanists’ and atheists have a better track record of following their principles than the pious do.  Possibly that’s because they can’t blame Satan when they do something inhumane or horrible.

3.  Pettiness at Easter finery? God forbid!

4. If you’re going to persecute people for not following your interpretation of scripture in their private sex lives, why not also persecute pork eaters, Red Lobster diners, men who shave, and those who wear mixed blend cloth? (All are banned in the Old Testament.) It would make about as much sense as persecuting gay people.

5. Most of the world is going to hell because they won’t accept Jesus as their personal savior, at least according to some of the right-wing religious nuts. What kind of cruel, demented god would create a world where that would happen? These are the same people who claim all life is sacred, unless you violate their peculiar religious dogma; apparently their god doesn’t agree.

6. It’s true: according to parts of the New Testament, Jesus came only to save the Jews and he didn’t have much good to say about the Gentiles. (Sorry, Rick Santorum and Pat Robertson.)

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Video: Richard Dawkins: “We Are All Africans”

This needs no introduction except to say the human race is descended from a common African ancestry and we should acknowledge that and stop fighting about the artificial barrier of ‘race.’ Maybe one day we will, if we survive that long.

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Today’s Music: John Coltrane, “My Favorite Things” Live (1965)

Soothing Easter Sunday music from the genius of John Coltrane and his arrangement of “My Favorite Things” that really hooked me on jazz way back when.

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Video: Republican Baloney Peddler Reince Priebus Denies GOP War on Women

The GOP War on Women is just a ‘media fiction’ invented by the Democrats and the ‘Liberal’ Media — like all those Republican votes against equal wages for women, domestic violence laws, birth control, and funding women’s health clinics never happened? And the Republican-dominated states that have proposed or passed laws for intrusive state-ordered vaginal probes, permitting employers to snoop into the private lives of women to see what conduct morally offends them, gov’t-mandated scripts for women’s doctors, allowing doctors to legally lie to women seeking an abortion, and trying to cut funding to programs that screen for breast cancer and other women’s health issues don’t exist? Republican National Committee head Reince Priebus (rhymes with ‘Reich penis’) ‘severely’ needs drug rehab to cure him of his blatant hallucinations.

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Signs o’ the Times: The GOP War on Women Drags On

1. The look the average woman gets when confronted by the kind of clueless ignorance displayed by Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus:

2. Why should a woman’s private sex life be judged differently than a man’s? For that matter, why is anyone’s private sexuality a concern of anyone else, and especially the government, as long as they’re doing it with consenting adults? The Victorian-pecksniff Big Media bigotry against grown single women who enjoy sex ‘outside of marriage’ is particularly ludicrous — how dare the tawdry soft-porn hustlers of the MSM, twisted talk show hosts, or hypocritical Republican politicians judge another person’s morality?

3. ‘Godless Vagina Girl’ will school ’em (thanks to the Godless Vagina blog for this item):

4. A Congressional hearing on women’s issues without any women testifying? Only an uber-Republican dipstick like Rep. Darrell Issa could think of that.

5. This is more true than some might suspect. These guys make drooling peepshow creeps with lap raincoats look respectable.

6. Say it again because it’s true!

7. This sums it up for the demented party that’s obsessed with controlling the sexual practices of women.

H/T to InternetWeekly.org, FoxEwes.com, Republican Dirty Tricks.com and the Godless Vagina blog.

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Today’s Music: Joe Pass, “Summertime” (1992)

Catch up on Joe Pass’ bio here while you listen to his nifty solo instrumental version of this George Gershwin/DuBose Heyward tune from the 1935 opera, “Porgy and Bess”.


Recorded live at the Opernhaus, Kiel, Germany, October 24, 1992.

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